Metal Mulisha

That's right. Metal Mulisha. We had nearly front row tickets to the coolest act in town on Saturday: Freestyle Motocross at the Northwest Washington Fair hosted by Metal Mulisha featuring the "godfather" of freestyle motocross: Mike Metzger.

I have found my new calling.

Although I've never really been on a motorcycle like the ones they use for motocross I am totally, 100% convinced this is something I can do. All we're going to need is ~100 yards of pre-sifted clean fill delivered to our house and arranged in one 30 foot tower of power with a landing ramp on one side and a starter jump at about a 75 degree angle long enough to shoot me 45 feet in the air. I figure this will give me enough clearance to practice my new stage act.

Bring it on.

I'm going to start with conquering the jump/land sequence itself, but when I get better I'm moving straight onto tail whips and endos. I have a new trick up my sleeve too. We've all seen the mid-air 360 where they launch off the ramp, pull back, go 360 over their back tire and land facing forward again. Child's play. I'm talking 360 degrees of fury spun from side to side. I've never seen it and I'm about to bring it. I swear we'll be seeing it at the next X Games. Anything but an exact, calculated, flawless landing will surely end in near-death bone crushing agony. I'm so ready.

So, I figure if we get started this fall (because, really, should we be starting this at 8 1/2 months pregnant?) we can totally transform our farm into the coolest motocross course around. Our neighbors will most likely disapprove, but once we've cleared out the cows and brought in some earth movers and completely changed our landscape into a barren motocross speedway how could they be anything but impressed?

If we sell the Harley and buy two new dirt bikes (ok, three or four since I'm sure my learning curve will leave one or more totally destroyed) and up our medical insurance coverage I think Todd and I could be the motocross twosome this county needs!