Thursday, March 4, 2010

You Learn Something New Every Day.

Night before last Todd was entertaining Colt by grabbing his toes one at a time and doing the "This Little Piggy" thing with him.  You know: This little piggy went to market, this little piggy stayed home, this little piggy had roast beef, this little piggy had none. And this little piggy cried wee wee wee all the way home. And now, having reached adulthood, I find several things seriously wrong with this nursery rhyme:
  1. Crying "wee wee wee." Did he pee on himself? How did he know where he lived in the first place? Didn't he leave in a trailer? How could he see where they went?
  2. The one eating roast beef. Gross. Although, if you'll remember correctly our pigs did eat the raw turkey neck at Christmas, remember? Still. Come on. Gross.
  3. The one that went to the market. I had always assumed that by saying he went to the market one meant he was shopping for produce at, you know, The Market. Not so. He went to the market to be slaughtered. And we tell our kids this like its funny? Not funny "ha ha", funny creepy.
So now I have to seriously reconsider even telling this nursery rhyme to our son. When you break it down they're kinda creepy.
  • Wee Willy Winky? Pervert. Why does he care where your kids are?
  • Hey Diddle Diddle. Diddle this. The dish and the spoon? Running? Right.
  • Jack Sprat? Weird. I guess opposites DO attract.
  • Jack and Jill? SURE they were fetching water. 'Cause that's what kids do nowadays.
  • and I could go on and on. Seriously?
What kind of nutso turns pig slaughtering into a fun rhyme?


  1. Don't forget Ring Around the Rosies, real cheerful to teach the little ones about death. :) But you know I had never thought about the pig going to "market", you learn something new everyday.

  2. You need more sleep. Seriously. STOP THE MADNESS. (Side note: Zoey brought me a copy of Little Red Riding Hood to read last week, and I SWEAR, how did I have that story read to me at such a young age without getting nightmares?!? Creepy wolf. Ugh.)